I told Jordan that this is not a venue that allows me to scrutinize her every move, and document her senior year. That would be unfair to her. Besides, she is currently living her life to the fullest, and as she phrased it so well, she is "finally acting her age". Although she still has struggles, Jordan is happy, has tons of friends, is doing great in school, has a job, a boyfriend, just got her driver's permit, and she is a talented singer.. Okay, so I'm a proud parent. :). I'm only mentioning Jordan's current situation to demonstrate that there can be a light at the end of the tunnel. Even when the struggles feel all consuming and endless, you need to believe that life can, and will, get better.
So, I guess the goal of Us Too is to try to demonstrate how we all got to this healthier, positive place. I can honestly say that it was not always easy. I can't tell you the number of times that Adam (my awesome, supportive husband) and I made mistakes, and afterwards apologized to Jordan. I'm talking all out screaming, say things that shouldn't be said to loved ones, kind of mistakes. We basically had to admit to her (and to ourselves) that we were kind of clueless, having never done this "raising a teenager" thing before. Not easy to do, especially for a competitive, sometimes stubborn, person like me. The way I see it, if things are going that badly within a family, it's never because of only one person's behavior. Everyone involved has a role, and most likely, everyone's behavior needs to change. Because life isn't supposed to be that painful.
No matter how angry, hurt, and scared, one thing had to be made very clear. We were all on the same team. The goal of this team, our team, was to help her find happiness and comfort, so that she could start to enjoy, and live, her life again. This blog will hopefully give you a glimpse into how we attempted to do this, starting with when Jordan was a very young child. As one of Jordan's therapists told me, "her childhood sounds like a textbook case of anxiety disorder".
If you decide to come along on our journey, I promise that you will witness the good, the bad, and the ugly, but more importantly, the love.