Sunday, December 4, 2016

You Would All be Better Off Without Me...

For better or for worse, when I was growing up, I couldn't stand the girls who pulled the whole “feel sorry for me crap”. It drove me nuts. My attitude was: Suck it up, get on with your life, and please don't involve me. Cringe? I don't think I was never rude about it, I just tried to avoid the drama.

And now my own child was throwing the ultimate feel-sorry-for-me-drama", at me. I felt emotionally manipulated, and I didn't like it.

After Adam helped calm me down, we talked to Jordan, making it vibrantly clear how good she had it growing up in our home: we respect her, we love her, and we value everything about her. We added that we will always be there for her, and conversely, we deserve the same in return. Lastly, I informed her that this type of behavior will not ever be tolerated.

What would possess an eight year old to throw this type of guilt trip on her parents? I wasn't even sure it was a guilt trip. I didn't know what to think. Was her plan to upset us or to run away? Maybe she didn't have a plan. Maybe she felt too much after seeing me lose it on all three kids, and she had no idea how to cope.

Although this post appears to be filled with only negativity and angst, I hope you can see it differently. We may not have expected the note, but at least we reacted to it in a calm and loving manner. And thankfully, Jordan heard us. She was receptive, and the look in her eyes showed that she understood how truly important she was to us.

And there's nothing negative about that. :)

Thank you.

Us Too

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