Monday, March 21, 2016

Love, Accept, and Forgive

Please forgive me if I have already touched upon this topic. I feel as if this is somewhat repetitive. I did let it sit overnight so I could get a different perspective, but that didn't happen. I figured I spent the time writing it, so what the heck. We are starting spring break, and transition times are not my favorite times...

I recently read the research regarding potty training and the effects it could have on children. The results seemed to be a mixed bag of information. Some theories put 100% of the blame on the parents who pushed, and made it an anxiety filled experience. It said that anxiety and depression are direct results of a negative potty training experience. 


Thankfully, there were other theories out there, that claimed issues with anxiety and depression are part of a person's chemical makeup. In other words, they were born that way. Phew. This is what may have led to the difficulties with learning to use the bathroom. Again, it's the nature verses nurture argument.

I am a firm believer that the basic personality, what makes a child daring, shy, insecure, crabby, mellow... it's inborn. Just like how some kids are born with blue eyes, allergies, or curly hair. If parents take the credit for the difficulties in their child's life, than they should also get the credit for their child's successes. And that's not fair to the children.

Ultimately, I guess it really doesn't matter why people are the way they are. What does matter, is how they themselves (and also those around them), learn to make the best of what they've got. Keep continuing to try, and figure out how the situation can be dealt with in the most proactive way possible. It's important to find the skills and the ability to accept the way things are. But remember, accepting a situation doesn't mean you are resigned to do nothing.

It's certainly not always easy to find this pathway to acceptance. but I hope we can all agree that it has to be better than living with feelings of blame, anger and guilt.

Thank you.

Us Too

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