Saturday, March 17, 2018

Still Our Jordan

So now we're dealing with OCD, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and OCPD. How do you treat one of these, or do you have to treat all three?  Maybe you don't treat any of them.  But then what? Continue to watch her suffer? The fact that lately she hasn't been hanging out with any friends fits right into the definition of OCPD.  Her way or no way.  It's been like this for as long as I can remember.

I just want her to be happy.

It took her from 3:00-8:00 to write a 150 word paper for LA.  It was as if on Friday night she decided the entire weekend would suck, no matter what.  Notice how I said she "decided"?  None of this was her choice or her decision. I know that now, but back then I didn't understand.

I used to naively assume that kids were messed up and struggled basically, because their parents failed them.  I certainly don't think that anymore.

I realize if she were to lose us emotionally at this time in her life, if we couldn't handle all of this, she would be in big trouble. She has no one else to rely on. But it's so hard to support someone who is unwilling to help herself, and defy's everything you try to implement, just so she can maintain some semblance of control.

And afterwards, when she apologizes and morphs back into the most remorseful, sweetest child anyone could ask for, it's rough. It's definitely taking it's toll on me. I'm fortunate that I can run again or I would be in trouble. I'm also very thankful that I have Adam. :)

Thank you.

Us Too

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